I’m amazed at how hopeful we are that our hearts desires will come to pass even as we compromise them, resign ourselves to settling for less than what we want. Countless women everyday, Kingdom queens, give themselves over to relationships that they know full well are not what they’ve prayed for, not the ones their hearts whisper about and hope for.
Why do we do this? Is it fear? Fear we’re expecting too much. I know I’m not the only one who’s heard time & time again “No man is perfect, Alaina. You’re asking too much. You better take what you can get and just deal with it. It’s what we all have to do.”
I know that no man is perfect. Perfection in humanity only manifested itself once, and that was in the Person of Jesus Christ. So, again, that’s not what I’m looking for. What I do believe, however, is that there is someone who’s perfect for me. Someone God created me to be a help meet for, for the satisfaction of our assignment here on earth. When Eve was presented to Adam, he recognized her as bone of his bone, flesh of his flesh. And sure, they had their issues. As a matter of fact, their issues became our issues. Adam and Eve are the template of what Christian marriage today is supposed to look like. They were a committed couple. They had their good times & bad times. They had issues with submission to the Father & each other, but they stayed together and worked it out. They worked together through their parenting issues, together through the death of their son. Adam and Eve did not have a perfect life but they were perfectly suited to tackle it all, together.
That’s all I want. Not the perfect man, but the perfect man for me, and it’s something I’m no longer willing to compromise.
The second stanza of Lonely Queens of the Thearchy reads:
Who him? He fits like a glove
Cause you’re making him fit
By trimming off the facts
And giving wishes back to wells.
The Thearchy’s queens have to stop settling to the point of our own unhappiness. The old saying used to be “a piece of man is better than no man at all.” This is so not true. And though any woman would raise her fist while telling you she doesn’t believe this old addage, she’s probably still living by it.
Peace of mind is what she’ll say is better but, for the most part, she hasn’t been taught how to go after it. Hasn’t been taught that it’s more profitable to take the time to get whole in herself than it is to try to plug up her heart’s holes with unfulfilling relationships.
Any man will do once we’ve stripped ourselves of all our hopes for love and fulfillment. But what’s at the root of the willingness to strip ourselves in the first place? What makes us throw our dreams & desires of soul mates & happily ever after back into the well of hope?
Is it timing or age? Or is it lack of self worth? Is it loneliness? Or is it that the seeds of self love have yet to yield their harvest? Is it our sex steeped society that reminds us everywhere we turn that an empty bed equals an empty life? Or is it that we really don’t trust our God to be Jehovah Jirah and provide us with all things…INCLUDING A MAN?
We must learn the truth of our self worth. Learn that spending time alone with ourselves & our God is profitable and will certainly buy us the lives our hearts so long for.
We must learn that self love is not selfishness. That it empowers us to make nurturing decisions on our own behalf. We must learn that anytime we’re willing to compromise the dream, to live beneath it, we’re absolutely not expressing love or respect to ourselves. We must learn that until we possess self love, we lack the capacity to love another.
We must learn to trust God to be the All Knowing, All Powerful, Ever Present Father we claim He is in our lives. God can only provide what we trust Him to provide. So then the question becomes will we trust Him with our hearts desires for a mate? Will we give Him the opportunity to manifest Proverbs 21:1…
The king’s heart is in the hand of the Lord; as the rivers of water, He turns it withersoever He will.
For this to happen for the Kingdom queen, she must get out of God’s way.
Blessings & Strength,